im back :)

sorry, didnt update that regularly here. been quite busy tho..

oh, just want to share to everyone that, i was having a wonderful day on my birthday.. ada surprise from my beloved hubby and received pressie as well :) and oh glad, and happy received a surprise from -Na a night before my birthday, datang kerumah bawa slice of cake and a candle with her fren along. thank you :) appreciate it! and i likeee~ yummy yummy.. photo? nanti tah mengupload hee..

today, i feel lil bit bored jua lah, and kesian my LiL gal damam and therefore, inda jadi attend the wedding.. stay at home saja lah spending time with dearest family..

and, ada jua lah mood swing.. and stil memajal si -Na supaya ia balek kb (HMPH!!)haha.. if balek, kerumah ah~ :)

counting days nie nunggu si bestfren balek from Berlin, bukan plg wait ia, wait barang2 yg di buy nya.. haha Kidding, ofcohz lah nunnggu ia, missing her so bad eh, but neway, as long as ia happy ah ah on vacation with dearest husband and children.

right now, im wondering why life is so boring sometimes, when i cant do anything right as in when i dont know wat to do to make everything fun! and also, wondering where my beloved husband will bring me out later, hee yea, looking forward for that deary! and sometimes, i do feel bored as ive nothing to do staying at home with my kids, its not dat im bored or wat with my kids, its just dat, i miss to my thing as in working, hang out with my mom and so on.. well, i do have fun with kids around and husband as well, its just dat, im just normal human being. i do think of getting a job again, go for work again, i miss having a job.. i hope just hope my skills wont ilang cmatu saja pasalnya batah sudah inda keraja. i HOPE! and plus, i want to work because i want to feel my own money lagi, nyaman rasanya makai duit sendiri untuk anak and laki, its not dat inda cukup or what, i do receive more than enough from dearest husband, its just that i feel mcm u know rasa as a mother kan mau bagi something dgn titik peluhnya untuk keluarganya? thats how i feel, mcm i want to do something and to give something for my kids and husband with my own sweat!

im still thinking on what i should do to make people surround me proud of me and happy of having me in their life.. i dont want to be such a loser, pathetic type of person.. i just want to stand up for myself and keep the happiness flowing btw my kids, husband and the rest of my family&friends. and yet, im still wondering, can i?

eh macam sedih jua this posting.. hehe sorry, terikut perasaan bah ni. but overall, yes, im happy with the love that flows from you sayang (hubby).. thanks for the support as well! and to my kids, thank you for giving the love and care although we always ada lips fight hee when sometimes i enjoyed debating with both of you, thats the funny and joy part of us. weird? well, thats hapen always between a mother and children, right? im glad to have them, i just inda dapat stop saying how glad and hapy i am by having my loving husband and daughters in my life, cheering my self up, making me smile and laugh! well, i believe jua lah ups and down in life and marriage and family.. nothing is perfect and therefore, life is not and wont be perfect! sometimes we cant get something dat we wised, dreamt about and hoped! but i do believe, life sumtyms di bawah and sumtyms di atas.. life is like a wheel! hence, live life like there is no tomoro :)

to those yang sad sad and heartbroken apa, cheer up, life is karma, motivate urself in order to move on, and listen to this, "dont try to fix the broken glass, instead, go and buy a new glass" think, wat if u fix the broken glass? bedarah jua jari atu kan? so therefore, u will feel the pain and hurt saja in the end. move on is the key towards the happiness.. Allah is always there to listen.. now inda happy.. im sure sooner or later, there will be happiness jua in the end as wat i was saying before, life is karma :) and Allah is fair.. be happy always tho u have to pretend cos sumtyms by pretending can make u forget all the sadness in ur life. be strong and brave person. dont let the negative atu conquer urself and mind.. u will end up ur life mcm er nowhere! everyone wants a happyending, and so do i.. i just cant wait and wont stop praying for that although im happy enough now, and im scared of losing my happiness :(

alright, till here for now, kalau boring g later, i will type some more, lastly, hubby, i love you so so much, thanks for being there for me dear.. i need you for now and then.. and my two lovely daughters, i love you and nothing can change that sayang... huggies and kisses for all of you as always..

much love from me.. :) have a nice sunday-day people :)